Monday, 19 May 2014

Define Definition


I am a writer.

I hate saying that and I feel embarrassed to define myself. It's because, good or bad, I suppose I will never fit in to a definition. I will always have excuses as to why I'm not really a writer or why I don't feel like a proper writer.

This is the same with gender, self-worth and self-image.
I'm not a proper woman because I don't conform to society's standards.
This is all I'm worth because I'm not a proper human being.
I'm not really crazy because I have moments of clarity that put some sane people to shame.

My words have been published.
My words have been quoted to me and used against me.
They have elicited reactions like laughter, hope, lust and validation.
My words have expressed feelings that I couldn't even begin to explain.

I am a writer.

There are better writers than me and there are worse writers than me but I need to stop convincing myself that I am not worthy of the title, any title.

I AM a writer,
I AM a woman,
I AM mentally ill,
And I AM a proper goddamn human being.

2 comments:

  1. Hi Miss!
    Your honesty and self-analysis are really inspiring. It takes some guts and brains to write that! :)
    Also, any society that wouldn't accept you for who and what you are isn't worthy if the name. So screw them!
    And those words you write, they reach me...
    Joso x

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    Replies
    1. What a beautiful comment to read. Thank you Joso. Xxx

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